Being True to My First Identity

John-Mark, Nancy, Heidi, Melodie, Mark, Jared and Nathan in San Pedro

In 2001 and 2002,  while living in the Ivory Coast and working among war refugees from Liberia and other English speaking people in the town of San Pedro, we were briefly home owners. In West Africa, because of the extreme probability of being robbed, many houses and compounds are surrounded by high cement security walls, often topped with broken bottles and razor wire. We had built such a wall around our property. One metal gate opened to the road to let in our vehicle and another gate allowed pedestrians to enter or exit. Small holes along the bottom of the wall allowed rain water to escape to the road.

Our house was located on the edge of a hill and in the rainy season water rushed down the hill, hit the wall and rolled either left or right. Our neighbors of course shared a wall with us, but additionally they had a security wall surrounding the rest of their property. However, and tragically, it had been compromised at the back. During one particularly spectacular rainfall, water poured down the hill, through the large holes in their back security wall and into their yard. Apparently they had not made any small exit holes for rainwater to drain out the front of the wall and, while they slept, the deluge of water from the hill poured into their yard, forming the equivalent of a huge swimming pool. 

Suddenly, in the dead of night and without warning, the shared wall between our two properties exploded under the crushing weight of the water. The wall's cement blocks were thrown at our house, sounding like nothing so much as the end of the world. There followed a minute or so of flood-like sounds and then eery quietness.

Mark, fully awake instantly, went outside to survey the damage. He saw the wall down, cement blocks laying beside our house and scattered over the hood of our van, and the metal doors lying in the middle of the road. 

And so we learned the power of unleashed water. But as damaging as it is, the Bible says that an unleashed tongue is even more damaging. 

The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, But the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness. Proverbs 15:2

Even so the tongue is a little member and boasts great things. See how great a forest a little fire kindles! And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell. James 3:5-6

There have been times I have been the target of an unleashed tongue and, sadly, there have been times when I have been the one with the unleashed tongue. However, the more I have grown in the Lord, the more I have taken advantage of a great rule of thumb I have found to be truly life-changing. 

I don't have to say what I am thinking! (Profound, I know.)

If someone has in some way done wrong to me and I am tempted to say something mean—and I refrain, I am not a hypocrite. If I resist an urge to say something that, in reality, should be left unsaid, I am not a hypocrite. 

In fact, just the opposite is true. If I use my tongue for good and not for evil, I am being true to my first identity—the person who I am in Christ. If I say things that reflect who I want to be more than they reflect my less-than-noble thoughts or feelings, this is wisdom. I am, again, being faithful to my first identity—the person who I am in Christ. 

And so when the power of someone else's words are unleashed on me like flooding waters or raging fire, I do not have to be a victim. Despite temptation to do otherwise, I can stand strong in the Lord and the power of His might and be true to my first identity. Who I am in Christ. 

By God's amazing grace, that is the real me.

See The Upside of Suffering.

See No Longer Playing the Part of the Martyr.